10 things I learned, found interesting, or used this month

Monthly Top 10 / /

1. Align your will with nature. This month I talked about how the Stoics aligned their will with nature by accepting what was outside of their control. This is how Epictetus might have advised me if my intention was to go to a football game and keep my will aligned with nature: Mentally rehearse what a football game entails—obnoxious people, expensive food, maybe someone will spill their beer on you. Remind yourself that nothing can go contrary to your wishes if you wish for things to happen the way they happen. If someone ends up spilling beer on you, remember that your intention was to keep your will aligned with nature, “which is impossible if [you] go all to pieces whenever anything bad happens.”

2. It’s just a number. Dr. Edith Eva Eger confided in her principal that she was considering getting her doctorate in psychology. Her only hesitation, she told him, was that by the time she earned it, she would be fifty years old. Her principal smiled at her and said, “You’re going to be fifty anyhow.” From that moment, she decided never again would her age keep her from doing what she wanted. She went on to earn her Ph.D. and become a world-renowned psychologist. She’s 95 years old and still practicing.

(Source: The Choice, Dr. Edith Eva Eger)

3. What you do after you hit the wall is where you gain the advantage. There was a time in each race when cyclist Lance Armstrong would hit the wall. Legs on fire, body screaming for a reprieve, he knew his competitors were feeling the same. This low point was precisely where he would gain the advantage. He would push past his limits and win the race. “No one is better at suffering than me,” he’d say.

(Source: The Compound Effect, Darren Hardy)

4. What you do after you hit the wall is where you multiply the results. Arnold Schwarzenegger, like Armstrong, exploited this power that existed on the other side of the wall. Lifting weights, he wouldn’t stop after his last rep; when he maxed out, he would use other muscles to “cheat” and pump out a few more reps—exponentially multiplying his results.

(Source: The Compound Effect, Darren Hardy)

5. It’s much better to read books that will enrich your life, rather than your career.

6. Focus on insignificant things, get insignificant results

7. The higher tempo wins. The world’s greatest American fighter pilot John Boyd said the side with the higher tempo (quickness in tactical changes, staying one or two steps ahead of the enemy) wins. Ten-time championship-winning college basketball coach John Wooden conducted all his practices at a high tempo. In fact, his players were so accustomed to the quick pace of practice that the actual games felt slow in comparison. Opponents couldn’t keep up with their high tempo.

(Source: Boyd, Robert Coram, & Wooden, Coach John Wooden)

8. Balance fast and slow. Similar to make haste, slowly, and keeping a higher tempo, John Wooden said, “Act quickly, but don’t hurry.” He explains, “When you hurry, you tend to make mistakes. On the other hand, if you can’t execute quickly, you may be too late to accomplish your task. It’s a delicate but critical balance.” 

(Source: Wooden, Coach John Wooden)

9. My favorite author Ryan Holiday released his newest book this month: Discipline is Destiny. 

10. Notable books I read this month:Wanting: The Power of Mimetic Desire in Everyday Life by Luke Burgis, A Better Man by Michael Ian Black, How the Word is Passed by Clint Smith, Put Your Ass Where Your Heart Wants To Be by Steven Pressfield

15 short strategies for getting the right things done

Life / /

A few years ago, this quote from Marcus Aurelius gave me a kick in the ass: “Get busy with life’s purpose, toss aside empty hopes, get active in your own rescue—if you care for yourself at all—and do it while you can.”

Since then, I’ve been on the lookout for ways to build my days around getting the right things done while enjoying life in the process.

Below are some of the best strategies I’ve found and used.


Plan, Plan, Plan

If we want to get things done, it’s good advice to start by jumping in. But if we want to get the right things done, it’s good advice to start by planning.

Brian Tracey said, “Every minute you spend in planning saves 10 minutes in execution; this gives you a 1000 percent Return on Energy!”

Robert Greene’s 29th Law of Power is “Plan All the Way To the End”.

Stephen Covey’s 2nd Habit in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is “Begin With the End in Mind.”

There are variations, but the message is the same: Planning saves time. Planning creates success.

Be Humble

It’s arrogant to think we can put things off until retirement. Who’s to say we’ll make it there? Who knows if we’ll still have the ability?

Our lifespan is insultingly short. We quite literally don’t have time to put things off. We have to start now. 

Eliminate Ego

Speaking of humility, The Office actor and producer B.J Novak said anytime he found himself in a career just for the money, he knew it was time to get out.

In my own life, only once I stopped letting my ego run the show (chasing bigger checks, sucking up to my boss), was I able to get anything of value accomplished.

Don’t Stress

If thinking about an activity causes you stress, stop yourself. There’s no need to stress. Just make the smallest amount of progress and call it a day. The next day, do the same. Then the day after that, and so on. It all adds up.

Tackle the Hardest Thing First

It’s been said that an hour in the morning is worth two.

Get up at a decent time each day and do the hardest thing first. Not only does this give you a better chance of getting that thing done, it also makes the rest of the day seem like a breeze.

Forget About the Outcome

Steven Pressfield said it best: “The amateur and the addict focus exclusively on the product and the payoff.”

If It’s Not a Clear Yes, It’s a Clear No

For decades, the furniture company Vitsoe has made the 606 Universal Shelving System—and nothing else. Why? Because the 606 Universal Shelving System was the only product that met their high standards.

Eliminate the inessential. 

Use Strategic Procrastination

Ever notice how once you complete your to-do list it fills right back up?

This is a law of life: we can’t get it all done. When we accept our limits, we free ourselves to pursue what’s most important to us.

It’s not how much but what you get done that matters.

Take One Step Today

“Don’t let your imagination be crushed by life as a whole,” Marcus Aurelius told himself. “Don’t try to picture everything bad that could possibly happen. Stick with the situation at hand, and ask, ‘Why is this so unbearable? Why can’t I endure it?’ You’ll be embarrassed to answer.”

Do The Thing, Or Nothing

Prolific writer Raymond Chandler credited his production to “two very simple rules: a. You don’t have to write. b. You can’t do anything else.” 

He would write by making himself too bored not to.

Give 100%, 10% of the Time

Every morning at 6 am, James Patterson would lock his office door at the J. Walter Thompson ad agency and write for two hours. At 8 am, he would open his door and carry on with his role as creative director.

Even while juggling other responsibilities, we can be 100% committed.

Don’t Plan It

Here’s how I used the opposite approach to my first strategy by not planning:

I used to make plans to exercise, penciling cardio and strength training into my calendar. It looked good on paper, but I never got around to actually doing any of it. It wasn’t laziness—I just couldn’t find the time for it.

So I decided to take a different approach. I thought of the things I did each day that didn’t require planning. Things so natural and automatic that it would never occur to me not to do them. Things I’ve yet to go a day without doing. Things like eating, or sleeping, or brushing my teeth. These are the activities that all the other activities have to work around.

I mentally categorized exercise as an essential activity (which it is) and stopped planning it. It would just be part of my after-work routine, and that was that. And this strategy seems to be working. I’ve maintained the same routine since starting it in December of last year.

Set a Stop Time

When his editor joked that he should increase his daily word rate, John Steinbeck wasn’t amused. “I like to hold the word rate down because if I don’t, it will get hurried and I will get too tired one day and not work the next. The slow, controlled method is best.” He would not “permit himself the indiscipline of overwork. This is the falsest of economies.”

Let the Effort Be Enough

Perhaps the advice that’s helped me most to get my writing done is from Steven Pressfield. Detailing his daily writing routine, he answers the hypothetical, post-writing session questions:

“How many pages have I produced? I don’t care. Are they any good? I don’t even think about it. All that matters is I’ve put in my time and hit it with all I’ve got. All that counts is that, for this day, for this session, I have overcome Resistance.”

All that counts is that he did his best.

Lean Into What You’re Putting Off

Generally, the greater the urge to procrastinate, the more important the task. That’s why when it comes to taking a shower, we don’t procrastinate. 

If you find yourself procrastinating to do something, good. You’ve found something worth doing.

2 rules to eliminate your fears

Philosophy / /

I filtered the notes I took while reading Discourses to share the two rules that Epictetus repeatedly gives for eliminating anxiety and fear:

  1. Concern yourself only with what is in your control; remain indifferent to everything else.
  2. Align your will with nature. Nothing can go contrary to your wishes if you wish for things to happen the way they happen.

Plenty of self-help books say that fear runs our lives, which I would agree with. 

They say things like, stay out of your comfort zone, or do one thing a day that scares you. 

This is great advice, but it presupposes a critical detail: that we are aware of our fears.

This is important, I’m realizing, because some of my fears are subliminal. And how can I face a fear I don’t know I have?

Luckily, Epictetus has an answer.

If we implement the two rules above, if we keep our labeling of ‘good’ and ‘evil’ to our own choices, if we align our will with nature, wouldn’t it follow that we would have no anxiety or fear to face in the first place?

Here’s a good recent example of how my fear went undetected:

I’ve been working with a writer/research assistant for about a year now. He’s a really cool guy who works with big-name authors, and I believe in his work and message. All of our correspondence has been through email, but I’ve been wanting to meet face to face to introduce myself and speak with him less formally. He lives in another state, so to meet him I would have to take time off work and travel. After some preliminary planning, I decided next year would be better. Next year I wouldn’t be as busy.

But after reading Discourses, and mulling over the above two rules, I had an enlightening revelation: I can just ask him to hop on a Zoom call with me.

I realized that my fear—fear of rejection, fear of annoying him, fear of saying something wrong, fear of being vulnerable—had kept me from seeing the obvious. At the time, however, I didn’t think that pushing a meeting to next year had anything to do with fear. My mind rationalized that next year would simply be a better time. (Like Steven Pressfield said, “We don’t tell ourselves, ‘I’m never going to write my symphony.’ Instead we say, ‘I am going to write my symphony; I’m just going to start tomorrow.'”)

And here’s the thing: I wouldn’t have had this fear in the first place if Epictetus’s two rules for eliminating anxiety and fear were more thoroughly embedded into my way of thinking. It’s probable I would have seen the obvious from the start. (It makes me wonder what other undetected fears are holding me back.)

My revelation came when I:

  1. Limited my thinking to what I could control (ask him for 15 minutes of his time)
  2. Shrugged off the “what-if” scenarios (he can say no and that’s perfectly fine because that is not in my control, and therefore, not my concern)

Here’s how I imagine a conversation with Epictetus about my concerns would go:

What if I ask him to meet on Zoom and he says no?

What concern is that of yours?

Yeah, true. Well what if he agrees to meet but he’s secretly annoyed with me?

Let me ask you, do you control how he feels?

No.

And if he declines your request or becomes annoyed, tell me, in what way does that harm you?

It doesn’t.

Correct. If another person’s actions or thoughts had the ability to harm you, you would be right to be fearful. But, as you know, harm is only found in your own actions and thoughts. Another person’s actions or thoughts cannot harm you. Even if they throw you in prison, even if they bind you in chains, they cannot touch the divinity that exists in you: your soul, your will. Your willingness to accept fate cannot be broken, only relinquished.

But what if I say something stupid?

If by ‘say something stupid’ you mean ‘make a mistake,’ I will ask, you are human, correct?

I am.

So it follows that you are liable to make mistakes?

It does.

You see, only plants and animals mindlessly obey. The gift that separates us humans is our ability to reflect and reason. Therefore, it’s our duty to use this gift by exerting ourselves and making mistakes. Otherwise, we’d be content grazing grass all day…

But what if it doesn’t go as planned?

Haven’t you reminded yourself to align your will with nature? If you wish for things to occur how they actually occur, in what way could they not go according to your plan? Besides, what is fated to happen has already been written in the stars the moment you were born. Everything has been decided. You do, however, have free will. You are free to will yourself to accept and make proper use of fate, of what’s already been decided. That is free will. Like a dog tied to a cart: we can be dragged by fate, or we can run along with it. We can graciously stay the course—or grudgingly be kept on it.

There’s nothing to fear, nothing to calculate, and no one who can cause me harm or anxiety as long as I remember the two rules: focus on my own actions, and willingly accept everything else.

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